Monday, March 31, 2008

The trauma

So a few weeks ago I was at a normal checkup at the doctors, and the doctor couldn't find the baby's heartbeat until he pulled in the utlrasound machine and checked it on the ultrasound. The reason he couldn't hear it was because it was beating at 90 beats/minute. (Which is pretty slow) So, I started freaking out right away, because I've never had any pregnancy complications before, EVER. The doctor told me it wasn't really bad, but he was worried. He told me to schedule my big 20 week ultrasound as early as possible so they could check on the baby right away. ( I was only at 17 weeks) And then he told ME not to worry. haha. I had my kids with me, which I'm grateful for because it stopped me from completely wigging out in public.
SO, I get home and call to schedule my ultrasound and the first available appointment is almost 2 weeks away! And I began the classic flip flop where I try and convince myself that if anything should happen I'll still be okay, and praying that nothing will happen because I won't be able to handle it. And I did that pretty much the whole 2 weeks. NOT okay.
The coolest part of this 2 weeks was watching the girl's reaction to what was happening. One day when I was really sad she said,
"Mom...the baby will live as many months and weeks as it needs to."
And I said, "How do you know that?"
And she said, "I don't know, I just feel it in my heart."
So, that cheered me up. And every time she prayed she said, "...and please bless Mom's baby to never die." That made me laugh every time. I don't know what I would have done without her :) I wish I had faith like that.
Last Friday afternoon was my ultrasound and it was awesome. The baby is totally fine, and the heartbeat was steady at 139 beats/minute. It was also obvious the baby is a girl, and the girl is so excited to have a little baby sister! (The boy doesn't really get it. :)
SO, I don't know what happened the other week. I feel like I was freaking out for no reason, but I can't seem to get a hold of myself when bad things happen. I am SOOO glad that everything is okay, and I hope next time I can stop thinking and just have faith.

7 comments:

Luke and Mel said...

I'm so glad I found your blog and so sorry you had to go through that. So scary! I am glad everything is okay. We are having another girl too. How fun is that? We still need to plan a Pullman reunion party.

Shannon B said...

Girl friend...I am soooo grateful too!!! These trials are so tough but don't you feel stronger and closer to the Lord!? That rocks that you are having a girly-girl (even though I already knew this). I am so happy for you guys, you are sooo awesome and you rock!!!

bowman family said...

I'm so glad to hear that everything is okay. How exciting to have another girl!!Congrats

The Mad Hatter said...

Glad to hear everything is great. Congrats on your little girl.
Alyson

Tilane said...

I didn't realize you are expecting. Congratulations! I'm glad everything is alright with the baby.

Higa said...

The girl is cute. :)
Kids are so much closer to the other side than we really comprehend eh? I hope the rest of your pregnancy goes smoothly. Congrats to you and Kenyon.

Mower Family said...

I found your blog through the pipeline and I'm so glad. Those ultrasounds are such wonderful things. I totally feel for you guys and I'm so glad that everything is good with this new little princess.